GTS OWNERS CLUB

Outlaw

Heavy drinker, 35, Cork area. Seeks gorgeous séx addict interested in
a man who loves his pints, cigarettes, Glasgow Celtic Football Club
and has been known to start fights on Patrick Street at three o'clock
in the morning.

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Donegal man, 50, in desperate need of a ríde. Anything considered.

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Grossly overweight Louth turf-cutter, 42 years old, Gemini, seeks
nimble séx-pot, preferably South American, for tango sessions,
candlelit dinners and humid nights of screaming pássion. Must have own
car and be willing to travel.

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Limerick man, 27, medium build, brown hair, blue eyes, seeks alibi for
the night of February 27 between 8 PM and 11:30 PM.

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Artistic Clare woman, 53, petite, loves rainy walks on the beach,
poetry, unusual sea-shells and interesting brown rice dishes, seeks
mystic dreamer for companionship, back rubs and more as we bounce
along like little tumbling clouds on life's beautiful crazy journey.
Strong stomach essential.

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Ginger haired Galway man, a troublemaker, gets slit-eyed and shítty
after a few scoops, seeks attractive, wealthy lady for bail purposes,
maybe more.

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Bad tempered, foul-mouthed old bástard, living in a damp cottage in
the arsé end of Roscommon, seeks attractive 21 year old blonde lady
with a lovely chest.

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Optimistic Mayo man, 35, seeks a blonde 20 year old double-jointed
super model, who owns her own brewery and has an open-minded twin
sister.

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Following a sad recent loss, teetotal Tipperary man, 53, seeks
replacement Mammy. Must like biscuits and answer to the name Minnie.
Thurles area.

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Bitter, disillusioned Dublin man, lately rejected by longtime fiancée,
seeks decent, honest, reliable woman, if such a thing still exists in
this cruel world of hatchet-faced bítches
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Whats a Clutch !!!!